Even as memories fade, their love chooses to stay

Lokmat News Network

Chaitali Joshi

Chhatrapati Sambhajinagar

In the era when Valentine’s day is often associated with grand gestures and fleeting expressions of affection, an elderly couple from a village near Sillod is redefining the true meaning of companionship, choosing to remain by each other’s side even as dementia slowly takes away their memories.

A marriage that began before they even met

Married at the tender age of 15 in a traditional arranged marriage, Suman (name changed, 75 years) had never seen her husband Madhukar (name changed, 80 years) before their wedding day. Like many couples of their generation, life soon became centred around responsibilities rather than romance. Madhukar, who served as a medical officer, spent several years posted outside town, while Suman stayed back home caring for their children and in-laws.

Sixty years together, yet time felt less

Though their marriage has now completed more than six decades, Suman says she always felt that they never truly got enough time to live together.

When retirement brought distance, not rest

After Madhukar’s retirement, a series of illnesses began to affect their lives, gradually creating distance between them through hospital visits, treatments and infection-related precautions. Eventually, Madhukar developed severe dementia, to the point where he could no longer recognise his own family members or even himself.

Choosing care over separation

Nearly three and a half years ago, the family decided to admit him to ‘Snehsawali’ care centre for proper medical supervision. While Suman initially agreed to the decision, the days spent away from him began to take a toll on her health as well. Unable to cope with the separation, she later requested her family to admit her to the same care facility.

Staying close, even when unrecognised

Today, even though Madhukar may not recognise her or respond to conversations, Suman prefers to remain close to him, checking on his well-being and spending whatever time they have left together.

Memories of togetherness that still remain

Reflecting on their journey, she says, “Till now, the days have been very good; he has never left my side. Whenever I was not living with him, I used to miss him a lot.”

A message of love beyond memory

In a heartfelt message to her husband, she adds, “Get well soon… I love you very much. I need your companionship.”

A lifelong bond in a single ukhāna

Even today, Suman fondly takes her husband’s name through an ukhāna that reflects her lifelong respect and affection:

“Mahadevachya pindavar bel vahate vakun, Madhukar ravanch naav ghete saglyancha maan rakhun.”

This Valentine’s day, love finds its truest meaning

This Valentine’s day, their story stands as a quiet testament to enduring companionship, where holding onto each other matters more than holding on to memories.